Anonymous Caller Foot In Mouth Every month or so, I manage to say something to someone which gets horribly misunderstood, and generally I can understand why they mix up what I mean, since it is poorly worded or they lack some other piece of information that changes the meaning... The real problem is, every time it happens, I end up feeling really horrible for a few days. Is there any way I can avoid this completely? Any techniques to get rid of it? Or do I have to bare it? I can deal... but it has a habit of painfully chipping away at my self image... Alucard Tepis If you are asking about how you can get out of feeling bad, you may have come to the wrong place, because I don't know of anybody...well okay a few, but they're in the minority...who would advise you to do that. Frankly, I think it is good that you recognize when you've hurt someone's feelings and feel sorry about it. It is a sign of a healthy level of empathy on your part. So, I would advise the best way to not feel so bad, is to keep your foot out of your mouth in the first place. You know you have a bad habit of misspeaking, so try to avoid doing that. If you have something important to say to someone...or if you simply have something to say to someone important to you, take a breather and think for a minute about what you are going to say before you say it. The old saying goes, "Be sure to start brain before engaging mouth." Somewhat trite, but it's the number one reason why toes end up between teeth. People say things without thinking. Thoughts get jumbled on the way out and misunderstandings are not only possible, but nearly inevitable. Say the sentence in your head before you say it out loud. If it doesn't make sense, look thoughtful and figure out what you are trying to say. Alucard Tepis Taking a second or thirty to get your thoughts in order before you try to express them, shows that you respect the other person enough to want to say something the right way. And if you aren't sure how to say it, tell the other person exactly that: "I'm not sure how to say this." "Don't take this the wrong way, because I don't think I'm being very clear." These and the like can go a long way.